Roughly 99 percent of the time,* a list that tries to rank more than, say, 15 or 20 of the best or worst items in any given category — assuming it's not quanitfied or scientific in any way, which is to say that it probably had its genesis somewhere on the Internet — takes a bit of a dip somewhere in the middle. Especially when it's something you come across the Internet. Top 100 best-looking cats? Bound to have a Sphynx. Top 25 movies about haunted boats? Gonna include "Haunted Boat." 

However, we're pretty sure we just found one that defies the odds:

Bleacher Report's: 50 Most Ridiculous Team Logos in Hockey History

Best we can tell, there's not one in the bunch that's not ridiculous. Case in point, #19:

(Image via Bleacher Report) 

Spend 3-5 minutes taking a look through the list. It'll make you feel better about yourself.

*A statistic we just made up but sounds pretty good. 

50 Most Ridiculous Team Logos in Hockey History

You know, there are some players it's not so difficult to imagine taking alternate career paths. Master Lego Artist Patrick Kaleta. App Developer Chris Clarkson of the Houston Aeros. Professional Chewing Gum Tester Stéphane Lebeau. And of course the Sedins, who are clearly destined for a star post-career stint as caricature artists.

From The Vancouver Sun's Pass It to Bulis Blog:

While the Sedins were in Öland, the identical twins were asked by Östran, a local newspaper, to take part in a strange experiment: draw self-portraits, in order to see if those would be identical too. 

Upon seeing Daniel's questionable handiwork, Ostran asked how he did in art class in school:

"What were my grades in Drawing? Probably a D," says Daniel.

Daniel's biggest problem may be his attention to detail. He's a natural finisher, which might explain why he finished so fast. Though it might just have been because he forgot he had a beard.

Daniel says he's pretty much done with his self-portrait. But it looks pretty naked.

"Shouldn't there be a beard too?" I wonder.

"Right, we got beards too," says Daniel and grabs the pen again.

Well, at least Hendrik is. Daniel can hold the paint.

Pass It to Bulis: I Find This Photo Odd: The Sedins do self-portraits

You'll have to forgive the tendency to wax nostalgic - which seems to appear in maybe every third blog post - but back when we were kids, waiting for the ice to freeze was a part of life. You went out with a drill two to three times a day to test the depth of the pond. You prayed for cold weather and rattled off every curse word you could think of, and some you made up, when after a week of freezing temperatures, the weather bumped back up to 50. But apparently, one father is looking to change that.

Doughty said he can freeze water pumped into the rink with a heat pump, and a mixing and filtering system that uses a calcium chloride solution.

"At present, I can get the rink area adequately frozen for skating when the outside temperature is 38 degrees or less," said Doughty. "I'm shooting to freeze the rink when the outside temperature is 45 to 50 degrees."

"It's still a work in progress," Doughty added.

Daddy?

"'Iceman' builds ice hockey rink at his home" - The Franklin News Post

A standard hockey rink is roughly 200 feet long and 85 feet wide, which means that the perimeter is going to be somewhere in the neighborhood of 570 feet. For our purposes, and because you wouldn't be straddling the boards while skating anyway, let's use 550. Anyhow, let's say that for some reason you wanted to skate a mile on the ice, that'd be just over nine and a half times around the rink. And if - for reasons we can't begin to imagine - you wanted to skate 125 miles? That means you'd have to skate around the rink 1,200 times. Or you could go to the Netherlands.

We recently came across an article from the Radio Netherlands Worldwide whose author takes, "a personal look at the sporting event whose very prospect has the Dutch in a frenzy."

And what is this sporting event in question? The reason the Dutch are in such a frenzy?

Continuing sub-zero temperatures are fuelling blanket media speculation that the legendary 200 kilometre Dutch skating marathon the Elfstedentocht - Eleven Cities Tour - will take place for the first time in 15 years. A definitive decision will be taken on Wednesday evening by organisers as to whether there is enough ice.

The author goes on to say that rather than don speed skates, he'd prefer to wear his hockey skates - something admirable enough, though the practicality of which certainly something to question.

"You're nuts," "you don't know what you're getting into," and "why are you taking the place of a real skater?" are some of the responses I get when I tell Dutch people of my plans. You see, most people who skate such long distances do so on speed skates, which have a longer blade and therefore give more power per stride. So, could they be right? Am I mad?

 Two hundred kilometres is a long way. You can go your own pace, but you do have to finish the tour by midnight. I have no idea if I would be able to make it on my hockey skates with their short blades.

Anyhow, as for when - and if, for that matter - this event will be happening, a write-up on NPR says that:

The exact race day hasn't been set but it will probably occur soon: the cold snap that's gripped much of Europe is likely to end. Anxiety is growing because a last minute thaw could kill the race's best chances in 15 years. That's right, the Elfstedentoch isn't an annual event - the last time it was staged was in 1997. It's only held when weather conditions are perfectly icy.

And if you're still interested in learning more and have maybe half an hour to spare - or maybe you've got some odd desire to get a gander of Dutch fashion from the 80s - there's this documentary as well. Enjoy!

NPR: Dutch Volunteers Clear Snow Off Ice, Hoping For A Rare Speedskating Event

Betcha haven't ever teared up on account of a tractor, have you?

Well, there's a first time for everything.

Via the National Post.

With all the talk of Frozen Fenway, you were probably wondering how much of the green stuff The Green Monster pumped into the regional economy, weren't you? Well, you were. Even if you didn't realize it. (Or at least that's how it was with us anyhow.) In any case, all jabbering aside, we've got an answer, (more accurately, the Boston Herald does, but who really wants to split hairs there?):

Last month's series of "Frozen Fenway" events at the home of the Boston Red Sox [team stats] pumped nearly $30 million into the regional economy, according to an estimate from the Hub's tourism bureau.

Most of the spending came from the two weekend hockey games (held Jan. 7 and 14) pitting the University of Vermont against UMass and Northeastern vs. Boston College.

"The direct spending from fans ... alone is significant, but we also saw a huge boost from indirect spending on ancillary services and staff needed to help support the visitor demand during this time," said Pat Moscaritolo, CEO of the visitors bureau.

All joking aside, it really was a remarkable event and already we're waiting with bated breath for next year. (However, considering it's still February, maybe it'd be better to breathe normally. At least until July.)

Frozen Fenway pumps estimated $30M into economy - Boston Herald

We get our fair share of mail here at USA Hockey Magazine — Slaps submissions come in by the truckload (it’s a fairly small truck), books appear on our desks and wait to be read and reviewed, extra issues need to be sent out and distributed, addresses need to be changed. But every now and again, we get letters. We read them all, but there was one we recently picked out of the bin that really struck a chord with us. It’s about as earnest a note as we’ve ever seen. And — having obtained the author’s permission — we’d like to share it with you.

Hockey Expectations by Lily Fine, Age 11:

Truth be told I’ve never played hockey. I used to wish to be on the team. Both my brother and sister played hockey and I’ve been dragged along to all their games. I watch and see all the players score goals. The smiles on their faces seem to make the whole rink glow. For a while, I was sick of hockey. I didn’t like going to all the games because they were boring. Then I told myself that the people skating are having fun. Imagine what it would be like to be them. My imaginations kept me occupied throughout the games.

The puck is coming straight towards you, so is the whole opposing team. You snatch up the puck and skate as fast as you can towards the goal. The goalie stares at you and you stare at the goalie, then you fake right and pick a spot on the left to shoot at. Your stick goes back and you concentrate as hard as you can. Suddenly you feel ready and you whack the puck as hard as you can. The buzzer goes off. Goal!! The crowd goes wild! You can hear the blood pumping in your ears as the whole team comes to congratulate you. What a game!!

My goal is to be the best I can be, to skate as fast as I can. If I shot and scored the winning goal, it would make me the man. But if I miss I will be sad, my teammates will comfort me, tell e it wasn’t too bad. But in my heart, I’ll always know I didn’t get the goal.